Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
