So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
can u get pink eye on your cock?
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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