Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Randomize
