I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
