i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
Is her dick bigger than yours?
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Randomize
