Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
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