i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Randomize
