Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Randomize
