Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
Randomize
