I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Randomize
