MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Randomize