He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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