u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
Your mouth is God's brothel.
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
Randomize
