Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Randomize
