Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
