Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
Randomize
