I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
