You're completely useless in the revolution.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
