I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize
