it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
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