Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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