please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Got drunk and tried to deep fry burritos. Turns out wild turkey isn't a good replacement for vegetable oil. Nearly burned my house down.
Sober people should be as daring as drunk people more often, because honestly the fact you’ve lived so long is a sign that anything is possible.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Randomize