Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
