I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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