sorry about calling you the devil all night.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
You ate ashes out of my bong
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Randomize
