Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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