to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Two words: blizzard sex
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
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