She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
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