Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
