big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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