I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
Randomize
