are you so shy because you have an std?
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Success! We fucked roommates!
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
Randomize