P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
Randomize
