just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
