Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Randomize
