so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
