New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life?
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Randomize
