We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
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