Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
Randomize
