I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
We got so high we made milksteak
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
