So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
