She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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