i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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