Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
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