wat bout pragnant strippers??
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
our cab driver is having phone sex.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
Randomize
