she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Randomize
