there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Randomize
