The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
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