too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
