just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
My balls are so social today.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Randomize
