Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
